Last night I experienced sleep paralysis again. This time, however, it was not like my first experience. I still felt the same crippling fear and shortness of breath as I felt during my first experience, but, the difference this time was in my overall reaction to it. This time I knew I was experiencing sleep paralysis and the images I saw were of a grim reaper slashing away at me while hovering over me. Knowing that I was going through this, I still felt a bit of panic at first, but, not as much as the first time. In fact, once I regained my composure, I started telling myself to try and get up and out of my body. I kept trying to move my body but I couldn’t. I finally pushed myself up and noticed a white noise getting louder and the air around me was vibrating intensely.
All of the sudden, with one mighty push I was thrown up into a standing position and I was in my room standing right in front of my dresser drawer. At this point the vibrations were so intense that it knocked me off my feet and back into my sleeping body. I woke up and felt my heart beating super fast. I finally had my first real “conscious” out of body experience and was fully aware and in control of it.
This time around I didn’t have anything negative or traumatic happen to me. Instead, I think I was opening myself up psychically to the experience and maybe subconsciously was hoping to finally get another crack at sleep paralysis. However, I do have to admit I did have a nightmare after that. I dreamt that my mother started crying and screaming for me to come help her. When I got to her I saw a huge growth on her lower back, around the kidney area. There was a huge lump protruding out of her body and she was in pain. She was afraid of dying and I held her in my arms and cried and begged her to be ok. I cried in my sleep a lot and when I awoke I could feel in my face the pain from crying while sleeping. After waking up I ran to my mothers room and grabbed her and hugged her. It was such an intense and gut wrenching dream. I felt helpless and hopeless.
I am logging this in my blog because I want to keep track of all my sleep paralysis and out of body exerpeinces. I want to go back and try to understand the relevence it has in my life. Why am I experiecing this? Is this me tapping into my infinite potential? What will I discover during these out of body experiences? How far can I go out of body? The point is, for the first time I was able to control something that seemed so uncontrollable. I am excited to have another out of body experience and looking forward to my next journey. I hope this time though, that I get passed my bedroom walls and possibly out into another dimension!